Okay I want some people that can act, awesome make-up people, special effects and naked chicks. Lots of naked chicks.

Or: Things Ashton Kutcher, Executive Producer of The Butterfly Effect, Wrote Down In A Composition Notebook.

Listen. I'm all for actors transitioning to the roles they're destined for; convincing other people to give them money.

But I believe a line has got to be drawn; at least in the name of good taste if there's going to be any future for the GOOD actors in that movie (like young Logan Lerman). Someone has GOT to set an example for these upstarts - someone's got to sit Ashton Kutcher down and explain that it's his purpose, his calling to save the Direct To Home Video & DVD business!

Skip it, guys.
Unless it's offered for free. I saw it for free and despite the comfy seats and the occassional "Ooo that was nasty" moment, I can't give this movie much of thumb in either direction.

You'd think a movie with temporal distortion and sharp production values would be GREAT, right? Well I'm sorry to say it just didn't make it, even with all the costume changes, make-up effects and full frontal. (And I'm sorry Ashton but sorority girls? only walk around in their underwear like that in your dreams)

Watch Donnie Darko instead. I promise you, you won't be disappointed.


Virus Watch: U.S. Bank

From: "U.S. Bank"
Subject Line: Your Account At U.S. Bank Has Been Suspended
Date Sent: 01.19.04

I'm not sure who these people think they're kidding.

Most people know where they bank. They know that their bank doesn't send out e-mail notification unless requested (like a deposit or an on-line checking summary) and they definitely aren't in on semi-national holidays.

U.S. Bank is one of the largest banks in the world (8th on the list, if you were really interested); and what I'm really curious about is who's responsible, ultimately, for the damages done (there are people in the world without a virus stripper): is it geocities? They provide anonymous e-mail accounts. Is it U.S. Bank? What if my name/e-mail address was on some kind of secondary mailing list they bought for direct mail?- does that make them responsible?

Somebody tell me; I'm really, really curious.


Stick a Needle in Your Eye?... Maybe.

Today I experienced acupuncture for the first time. We had just finished lunch when we noticed there were more people than usual just hanging around in the cafe. As it turned out, because of the "grand re-opening" of the gym at work, free massage, snacks and acupuncture were being offered to everyone that stuck around.

There weren't very many people near the people with the needles.

I like to think I'm an adventerous person, so I sat down, read the brochure about Chinese Medicine and waited to be administered to. In that time I learned all about how the ear is "fetal" and it's part of how the points in the diagram were rendered.
Don't ask me how the rest of it works.
I don't know.
I like a little mystery with my science.

Not too long after I'd read [insert something anti-Western Medicine here; anti not con], a nice woman with a very sedate energy came by with a set of needles for my ears. I had been ogling the other girls sitting nearby and was a little worried. Were my ears built the same way? What if the needles fell out when I said something? Why was it just us girls? Did the guys know something we didn't? Would it hurt?

The million dollar question: Would it hurt? Everybody has that friend of a friend that went for accupuncture and it "hurt like hell" and had a horrifying experience and never went back again.

But ah my friends, the answer is: Not even a little bit. I've had sneezes more painful than what she did to my ears. And what an experience! After the initial zing, yes zing, what happened in the next five minutes was I just relaxed.
After ten minutes I was calm, my heart rate had slowed. At work.
And twenty minutes in? I was zen.

As I sat there in a chair, the nice woman with the needles told me that the reason most people share horror stories is because they haven't done their research.

What I gleaned in my half hour today is that the BIG NEEDLES are a Chinese technique used for the deep tissue method and I could experience "what I might consider pain" but the release I would feel would be incredibly powerful and ultimately relaxing. The kind they recommend for beginners is the Japanese variety that's runs just under the surface.

I'm babbling - I've been impressed. And? I've got these weird little magnets on my ears for the next week. Supposed to help with circulation & concentration & what not.

Anyway - Acupuncture: try it, you'll like it.